Idiot Savant--w/ emphasis on idiot
this was not part of my resolutions….
I just got a call from my mother in Kentucky. My dad has cancer in one of his kidneys and it is malignant. According to the MRI it is contained in the kidney, but I’ve been through enough of this shit to know that it could spread easily, and quickly.
My hands are shaky as I type this, but I can’t get my wife on the phone and I’m sitting at work sort of freaking out. I didn’t expect this. But then I guess you never expect it do you?
My dad is my rock. He is an arch conservative, andy griffith of a man, but that never stopped him from being supportive of his polar opposite son. I remember when I was a sophomore in High School my band played at a state wide Future Homemakers of America convention in Louisville. It was this cheesy thing, but back then it was like playing MSG for me. We had a huge stage set up in a ball room, but the manager came in and told us he was going to shut us down because of some ludicrous sounding safety regulation. Something about people might trip on our cables.
My father asked him to take a short walk, came back 2 minutes later and told me everything was fine and to continue setting up for the show. When I asked what he did he took me to the side of the ball room and pulled back a large curtain to an adjacent ballroom under renovation. Their were electrical wires hanging from the ceiling. Tons of them. Coming out of the walls. Everywhere.
Dad is an electrician. He told the hotel manager that this room was violating LOADS of state electrical code and one phone call from him would have the entire hotel closed for a week. The manager relented.
That’s my dad. Strong. Rugged. Wise. Honest. Do anything for anyone. The greatest human being I know.
I’m freaking the fuck out right now…
So I’m gonna take a walk to the library. Maybe grab something to eat. And try to regain some optimism. Its a new year. Anything can happen.
Whatever happens, he is still here right now. Yes, he could die. But you can decide to focus on the fact that he is alive right this minute. And right this minute is the only thing you can access. Think strength!
